I am recovering right now from a total of 2 hours of sleep.
Yes, I saw HP at the "witching hour"...how very witty.
Did you not know, that before Twilight, I was a Harry Potter crazy?
Well I am still a Harry Potter crazy...but more on that later.
Anyway, I am going to confess something.
I decided to finally tell all of you the truth, after finally revealing my deep dark secret to my friends on Monday night.
I wouldn't have told them the truth, but I was under the influence of chips and salsa.
And the truth came out like it was nobody's business.
And they laughed...and they grabbed their throats as if the knowledge of my misdeeds took them over the edge....and one of them even wrote down my secret so he could share it with the world. But dude! I won't let him share my secret before I do!
It was a Sunday morning, 2 months ago.
We don't believe in spending money on the Sabbath, so I like to have all necessary ingredients on hand for any meals that will be cooked on Sunday.
Well, I knew that for Zach's Birthday/Mother's Day I was to bring a homemade cake.
I carefully looked over the recipe and picked up all of the items on Saturday.
As I was measuring out the flour into a bowl, I found what looked like beige little poo-balls. I immediately knew what they were, and started to panic.
"Weeeeeeeavles! In the floooooooouuuuur! And it's Suuuuuuuuunday!"
I didn't know what to do! I couldn't break the Sabbath and run to the store, and I couldn't show up at the party cake-less. Unless I wanted to be gnashed to death by my mom's razor sharp teeths. And trust...no one messes with her when carrot cake is involved.
So what did I do?
I didn't want to die...so I was left no choice.
I said, "Oh well." and I mixed them weavles right on in.
I made sure to add a little extra walnuts just to make sure I could mask the crunch :)
Happy Birthday Zach! Eat them Weavles!
Happy Mother's Day Mom! I got you a special surprise!
Best part?
Everyone raved about the cake.
the end.
So, do you have anything to confess? go on ahead :) It's a party!
75 awesomespice comments:
YAY!! First!
I love confessing...it's so cleansing. Now let me think of what to confess....I'll be back!
i saw harry at the witching hour last night as well! i now need to see it while more of my brain is functioning...
cracks me up about the cake...at least no one died.
ummm...confession i will have to think about.
whoa.. 3rd. that's crazy.
ummmm, please tell me you are kidding.
the end.
here we go:
new moon is premiering in knoxville two days before the true release date and cast members are supposed to be in attendance. and i'm not sure i want to go.
i have a tattoo my parents don't know about. dumb? yes. but i like having a secret since they know everything else about me.
i read cosmo even tho i have no business doing so since i am not married. i think of it as "studying up" so i will be ready when or if i actually get married.
and, i made fun of the bump-it commercial when i saw it. then i read how you bought some. and felt bad. let me know if they work or if i was right to giggle?
HaHaHa! I can't believe that is true! If I was your fam I'd be gagging right now.
I also saw HP last night and only got about 1-2 hours sleep. I can't believe I'm still functioning!
Weavles! Ewe! I would have made my honey go get me flour from a friend so I didn't have to go to the store.
Secrets...I have an alter ego facebook page so I can spy on this girl I used to be friends with. It's very jr. high, but she does really dumb things and I find great joy in reading about her exploits on her facebook. Shh. don't tell!
I LOVE that story! If were your family I would be dying right now!
BUT, the cake looks amazing, and I am sure that it tasted just as good.
Often times when I..um...pass gas, Spencer will give me a dirty look. I always blame it on Grace, and Spencer believes me...
Hows that...
Chellie - dead serious. I can't make these things up, ya'll.
Amanda - dude. I bought the bump-it because I make fun of them mercilessly. Just wait for the post about them!
Sarie - LOVE that. I wish I could do that.
SOOO funny! Seriously SURPRISE! hahaha
Confession. I wish this was the summer before my Senior year again... I miss the beach, the spontaneous adventures and being that cute & tan. I guess I can dream!
ohhh....emmmm....geeee!!!!!! Not gonna lie...I dry-heaved. Yikes. And then I giggled. Like a hyena. Do hyena's even giggle? Oh well, I did it. UM....I don't think that I have anything major to confess. Or even minor for that matter.
Hey...did YOU eat a slice of the Weavle Carrot Cake?? :p
Ohhh and I'm probably the only person EVER not seeing HP this week.. no one to go with... I'm such a loser.
hooray!
and because this is too much fun:
my ex started dating another amanda after he broke up with me. so, i chalked his car and wrote "love amanda"-him nor new girl know who it was. it still makes me happy to think about.
ok. i promise i am done. thanks for the 'fession session =]
Alicia - Of course I partook of the delicious weavle-cake. Srsly.
At least you didn't go to the store-I'm impressed that it was homemade! I'd have done a mix.
Hahahaha..weavles can't be that bad. I'm sure it's all just mental! But that's good you didn't just go to the store, I'm sure if it was me I would just go:/ I know I'm terrible.
Oh ps, thanks for commenting on my blog, that's really cool that you go on your reader's blogs, even though you don't know them:)
If I'd been at this party and read this after, I'd be traumatized. My biggest fear is bugs in my food! Believe me, I've accidentally eaten ants in syrup, twinkies, and parmesian cheese. I srsly stare at my food before every bite for just a second to make sure nothing's wrong with my food. Very bold of you to blog. HAHA
EWWWWWW
I'VE THROWN UP FROM WEAVLES BEFORE!!!!!!!
Confession:
I used to be a thief.
I stole hangers from Emily's closet.
All. The. Time.
I've never even seen a weavle, so I'm kind of sicked out. Srsly, can't you sift them out??
Confessions: my friend April and I "borrowed" her parents car when we were 14 and then accidentally ran into the house (on the sabbath even). We patched it up real nice with some premixed stucco we found in the garage and when they commented on the slightly imperfect section we said we thought the sister missionaries might have hit the house.
tee hee. thanx L. we think our babe is pretty cute too!
i confess...sometimes i still suck my thumb!
WHAT!?!
YUCK!!! lol
So my boss and I are usually the only ones in our office, unless we have patients(and during the summer we dont have too many appointments). Well I really had to go to the bathroom, and I couldnt hold it until I got home. So I went, and just my luck I clogged the toilet. And we dont even have a plunger in the office so I would have to call his wife to bring one down for me. Well I walk out to go tell him or call her and he asks me, "Are you alright? You took an awfully long time." I was seriously in there for 4 minutes!! So because was rude and embarassed me with that question I didnt tell anyone. The next afternoon when he went to go use it he couldnt remember who had been in their last!
Mmmmmm...protein.
OME!?! I could say I was astonished but I can't because...
My father really likes cheese, so in my house there is always a big round cheese.
One beautiful day, when I was about 4, I decided (I still don't know why!) to insert a spaghetti straw (Can I call it straw? I don't know, sorry.) in the cheese. All of it and then I cut the edges so that it was not possible to see that something was wrong with the cheese. All I can remember is my father saying that the cheese was funny. Ahah :p
Confession. I love High School Musical 3. I have all the songs memorized and sing along when I watch the movie. And I may swoon a little over Zac Efron. Okay, I do.
oh my gosh.
that is THE funniest thing i've ever heard.
and i wish i could think of something to confess...but i'm all out of ideas right now...
I will tell my weavles story...Thanksgiving 2002 hubby and I go over to the parents house for dinner. I didn't cook anything. I looked down at the gravey and said...Hey Ma..I think there are weavles in the gravey and she yelled"NO THERES NOT..THATS PEPPER!" So my dad said..I don't remember pepper having legs, but what the heck...and he took a big mouth full of gravey! What a good dad!
Once, a dearly loved family member served me Hamburger Helper with LIVE weevils in it. I wasn't going to say anything, but when the stuff on her fork was moving as she went to take a bite - I had to stop her.
Ha ha funny story!
My bad cake story: It was in high school we had like a homeroom class once a month on Fridays. Well a friend of mine and I had to make some treates for class. We got all the stuff and came back to her house to make it we did everything perfectly. Well she was getting ready to transfer the batter to the pan and "BANG"! It fell on the floor... We laugh, think about what we want to do proceed or give up then she says, "Hurry and help me scoop it back up" clearly exceeding the 5 min. rule! When everyone else was digging in the next morning I am trying with all my might not to bust out laughing. She (my friend) leans over to me and says, "Get some you're gonna make it look like there's something wrong with it". Hmmm ya think?
Oh BTW I'm going to see HBP on Friday. Was it any good?
OMGosh that is gutsey!!
I also went to Harry Potter at the witching hour and got a little bit more sleep than you did, 6 hours =)
I'll confess, I can't think of anything to confess to???
you are stronger than I, Lauren. Idk that I could've knowingly eaten Weavle Cake :p
Hey...was Harry Potter any good??
I agree with Heather...she's pretty smart in the cake department. Just get a really fine mesh sifter and they should come right out...most of them atleast.
in your own use of the word that is sicknast! hahahahah how funny great job confessing ummmm i guess mine would be that when i was kid i would wait up til midnight behind the couch listening to my parents talk cause i thought they were having partys without meeee srsly!
So THAT'S why that cake was so darn good! :D
you will pay
BAHAHAHAHA!!!! Oh Lauren, that is HI-larious! rofl.
I, too, saw HP yesterday :D
I went to a midday showing down here so I didn't have to sit with annoying kids. It was soooo good! haha
This is so funny! While I can't think of a confession of the top of my head, I can think of a time where I was making a bunch of rice, and after I started up the cooker, I looked back in the rice jar and saw a whole bunch of little red bugs...
I guess we ate them :)
I feel dumb. What is a weavle?...I guess I'm the only one that doesn't know what that is. I can't think of a confession off the top of my head. I'll come back :)
one: that is SICK. and also very funny. when i was younger i was eating ramen and looked down and noticed a ton of dead weavles in it. i don't think i ate ramen for years.
two: so jealous. i wanted to go see HP sooo bad but couldn't/can't because of this debilitating pregnancy sickness.
three: i can't think of a good confession, although i know i have to have some. i'll be back when i think of one.
OOOOoooh that's so NASTY!!!! I hope you had some too and they weren't too bad. ha ha!!! You are HILARIOUS. and gutsy. In more than one sense of the word. :P
ok that's WAY too funny. Your family might not trust your super delicious cakes ever again...
I saw you last night getting treats at Wally world. haha did you see me? we had like 5 $1 candies we illegally snuck into the theatre. totally worth it
hmmm...confession...
when I used to live at home I would use my mom's makeup when she wasn't home so that I wouldn't waste my own. That stuff isn't cheap! haha :)
I just spit all over my computer!!!!!!!
Under the influence of chips and salsa you confessed to feeding your family weavels? Bahahahahahahahahahaha
Seriously? I would never have guessed such a sin from you. I would at least have sifted them out :P
Pretty sicknast about the weevils. Did you eat any cake? Not quite sure how I feel. Although I have tremendous respect for your choice to not break the Sabbath.
Anyhoo, straight from my grandma, add bay leaves to your flour and it keeps the buggies away.
I have a 25 pound bucket of bread flour in my pantry that has remained vermin *puke* free for months since I added bay leaves.
that is the grossest thing I have ever heard. ew. but you're still awesome :)
Roaches and weavles? EWwwwwW.
I'm sure we all have had a few weavles here and there...
1- I don't care about the potter. I'm not even sure I have seen the last one. I'm probably the only one in the world who will wait for DVD.. :)
Confessions?
Once when I was cleaning out some stuff of mine out from an old boyfriends house, I grabbed his toothbrush and scrubbed the toilet with it for a few minutes.
It brought me some satisfaction..
Um ok... that is just gross... and we just caught my mom doing exactly the same thing....she wondered why we didn't eat her homemade cake, my dad loved it,(we didn't tell him about the extra serving of protein he was getting.)
Hmmm, what to confess...
Ok, i play dress up... when Jeremy is out of town, and the kids are in bed I play! I go all out, hair, make-up, the works...it keeps me connected with my inner child.
And i make up monologues while on the toilet...always have, always will. do my confessions make me a freak...don't answer that.
Oh well, some extra protein for the cake.
If it ever happens again you can always sift the weevils out.
And putting your flour container in the freezer when you get it home from the shops kills the weevils eggs so they can't hatch.
yeah total sicknast! haha but oh well cant beat deliciousnesss..
CONFESSION
I just wikipedia'd weavles! no lie. i was like uh... what? at first i thought you meant like mouse droppings but they were like paleish color because of the flour? idk.
Anyway real confession
[this is really hard!] uhmm... my bathroom is covered in j-14, twist, popstar, m... all those tweeny gossip mags POSTERS. so selena gomez stares at me while i pee.. and the joebros welcome you in the bathroom... robward and jaylor watch me brush my teeth.. zefron borders my mirrors... and so on.. even lady gaga, paramore and miley are in there too.. crazyness. funniest part is that it's a semi-public bathroom since i live in a dorm but just my bff and i use the bathroom downstairs so all the upstairs chicks have no idea..
ok i looked back at people's comments to see how to spell "weevils" and there are two different spellings from many people.. so i don't know how to spell it!.. maybe that 's my confession! and ah! sick! i am a freak about stuff being in my food! i would have thrown up if you told me i ate weevils!
confession...i hate my husbands job!!! i wish he'd get fired or quit! love you babe!
hahah that is just hilarious about the little weeviles!
Confession: I want to get my nose pierced for 2 minutes then take it out, or get another piercing in my ear. but im to scared.
I have no idea what weavles are and no online dictionary seems to be able to help me. I'm curious.
My confession?
I kinda like the Jonas Brothers...
Weavels are so disgusting....DID YOU EAT A PIECE OF CAKE!!!!!!! haha :) protein!
CONFESSION: I am not in love with Zac Efron...I am in love with his on screen character Troy.
I LOVE High School Musical and know ALL the lyrics. I teach 2nd graders and the other day at school these girls were talking about the movie. I jumped right in and gave my opinion on why I think Troy and Garbriella should be together and they looked at me like I was crazy!
I would say "GRoss!!!" but I ate oatmeal with ants mixed in when I was living in the wilderness. I survived and it looks like the cake eaters did too, so it's all good.
First of... ew... that's gross. Second... why can't you go to the store on the sabbath?
No confessions that I can think of, I'm no good at lying usually and can't keep a secret to save my life. So usually I tell on myself right away. hahaha!
Okay my confession goes hand in hand with yours. We have a weavel problem in our house that gets really bad every summer. They are EVERYWHERE and I cannot afford to throw away all my food so.....I just pick them out when I see them. I know we have eaten them! I love that you still used your flour! Way to use what the good Lord gave ya! If you put your flour in the freezer it will be better! Also, if you put the "infected" item in the sun, they will leave! (random sidenote)-I had a bag of chinchilla food in my car(yeah I had a chinchilla....jealous?!) It must have been old becuase when I went to get it out of my car.......there were THOUSANDS of weavels crawling on the roof of my car. It looked like the entire ceiling was moving. I may have had nightmares for dayS!
Gross.
Are you serious?
You are sooooooooooooo bad.
HAHAHA! Oh my goodness, I feel safe laughing at this story since it wasn't me who was eatin' the weevil-cake (otherwise reading this might have me reachin for a hefty sized barf-bag). But hey, I think it's awesome that you don't spend money on the Sabbath! And while I'm weak-stomached and easily grossed out, I'm sure the extra lil bit of protein in that cake didn't hurt nobody. Ain't nothin but a thang.
My confession:
I am 23-years-old, and I have a Hannah Montana song on my ipod. I sing and dance to it in the car like a fool. The song makes me happy while I'm sittin in traffic, and yet, it also makes me want to punch myself in the face just for liking such utter cheesiness... but the song is just so darned catchy! What's a Disney Channel watchin grown adult to do?! Hide my head in embarrassment? Yep, sounds about right to me. *facepalm*
Are you serious? that is NASTY! HP was AWESOME! anyways...confessing...I always confess I really am an open book and tell people everything.b
No. Really? You did?!!
Yuck. Good thinking putting on extra walnuts!
haha, i thought they were called weebles. i would have just gone to get new flour...I'm sure God wouldn't have minded...
omg Busy Bee Lauren I am in shock. I don't think I can ever eat anything you bake, ever again. Like never. So forget about sending me that bday cake in December bc it'll just be a waste of your little weavle time.
kthanxbye
If ever I meet you IRL and am presented with an opportunity to consume your tasty baked goods...I might think twice :-) I LOVE that you went with what you had and served it anyway!! I love even more that you family does not appear to have totally freaked out hearing the news.
You're my hero.
I thought about giving brody benadryl on our plane ride. I got as far as the grocery store, drugs in hand. BUT, I didn't... aren't I horrible for even CONSIDERING it!? i hear a lot of mom's do... but in the words of Tony "it's wrong"
That's just plain NASTY.
My grandma always says that it just adds a little extra protein. So weavles are actually good for you! way to go :)
A-a-a-a-a-ck! I guess what the family didn't know won't hurt them...but YOU ate a piece????
I just died... But then I was revived and now Im typing. Confession... I sometimes wish I was a slutty sexy girl just like Megan Fox. I know. Shameful. But seriously... shes HAWT!
I'm glad your mom seems so positive about it. My mom would KILL me (not literally) if I ever did that. Is this your first time admitting it or did you tell them after they ate it? Your poor unsuspecting family.
Confession-
In the 6th grade I danced to the song "Oops I did it Again" in front of everyone at a public pool on the deck. I did all the Britney Spears' moves. (I did this on more than one occasion) Everyone told me to keep doing it. I assumed they thought I was good but they were really teasing me. I don't know what I was thinking and I'm totally embarrassed just thinking about it. I was such a dork!
Can I link to this in my next blog post? I found it halarious!
I confess that I have no idea what weavles are
What's a "weazle"?
Confession: I accident;y jumped on a hot guy. I hate Marco Polo now.
Can I just say, I have had the most HORRIBLE bad day ever...in tears...hate my boss...miserable mood...that is, until I read this. I laughed SO hard that I forgot all about how sad and miserable I am! :) Thanks for making me laugh!!!
I have nothing to confess except for some frequent thoughts of my boss being fired on Monday morning...
Okay seriously that is hilarious! I am super proud that you didn't go to the store, I would have ..i am naughty :) but i am glad your cake was awesome, thanks for the laugh!
This is by far your best post ever. A little extra protein never hurt anyone, especially when they don't even know about it;)
Lauren, you are srsly nuts. I think you are great, and thanks for the laugh!
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