you know when you can tell that a guy isn't making eye contact, let alone looking anywhere near your face and you automatically know that he is checkin' to see how the girls are doin'?
most girls go, "ugh! what a perv!"
not i. no, i think one of the following:
1. "hmm...how unfortunate for him. he thinks he will get his jollies, when in fact...all he will get is a headache trying to figure out if i am a girly boy...or just an unfortunate "unblessed" girl."
2. "lookin for my boobs? tell me when you find them."
3. "'my poor husband'? yeah...i think the same thing."
4. "thank you for noticing the boobs instead of the zit on my face!"
yes my friends. i would rather someone look at my non-existent boobs than stare at the pustule on my poor face...
it is quite the fete that few have been able to accomplish. looking away from the ginormous zit that takes over my face, and instead looking at the Casper boobs.
a fete that even the tedward...my HUSBAND has not been able to overcome.
this past weekend, whilst driving to visit my grandparents in Overgaard, the tedward confirmed my worst fears. he noticed the third eye on my face. i had failed at covering it up with an entire bottle of Covergirl. sigh...
let me set the stage...
i was talking to him about "Catching Fire" (obvi) and he was listening intently but i noticed he wasn't looking in my eyes...and not far enough down to search for the "boobs". my suspicions were confirmed:
ME: "yeah...so Peeta is hot and i looo..wait. are you looking at my zit?"
TED: "phew! YES! thank you for just coming out and saying it. that thing is huuuuuuuuuge!"
ME: "really? i hadn't noticed...you know, with it covering up my entire face and crap."
TED: "yeah! it's like a third eye!"
ME: "oh thanks."
TED: "no! it's bigger than both of your boobs!"
ME: "hmm...anything else you'd like to say?"
TED: "no..haha! so anyway what about Peeta?"
(ten minutes later)
ME: "are you looking at my zit again?"
TED: "how could i not!? it's huuuuuuuge!"
ME: *facepalm*
71 awesomespice comments:
FIRST!!! I hate when you feel like you have a third eye and that's all anyone notices. it's like the worst thing EVER!
i can totally relate!!! my husband always does something stupid like covering my eyes and asking if i can still see him... way to make me feel beautiful and loved hunny!!!
haha oh zits, how I hate them, fortunately I am very well endowed so boys usually check that out instead of my face which is ugly 9 times out of 10 haha. But I am one of the girls who thinks geez what a perv...
HA HA HA HA!! Ted. You be funny. I say no special hugs for him.
I feel you, sometimes they overcome us. I hate my boobs, they got bigger when I got pregnant and have decided to make my body their home! I wish they would go, I would give them to you if I could!
i needed this smile today.... it's my peeta/lauren/zit smile
x
HHHAHAH--"casper boobs"
girl tell me about it.
You make me laugh. At work. And not at work.
PS Casper just reminded me it is ALMOST HALLOWEEN. I'm thinking H-Weenie (yes i said weenie) Partay!
Oh these zits...I hate them. My brother once thought I had a hickey, but it actually was a zit. I bet you can imagine the size of it. Maybe that makes you feel a little bit better.
Oh I do hate zits. They're horrible. Unfortunately...I bust on the Hubby-Man about them just as much as he does me. As for the girls?? They're um....well, they're NOTICEABLE. and EVERYONE notices them...swear it. Hubby-man? LOVES THEM! Obsessed. Its all he ever thinks about...the first thing he reaches for...I swear it. I really just don't get it. *sigh*
Awww! poor busy bee! :(
So if it makes you feel any better, I've been reading your blog for a while and I always look at all the pictures (cause let's face it, your pictures always rock!) and I've never noticed.
But maybe that's cause my girls are tiny too. LOL
Adam does this to me all the time... He has to point it out when I have a bump.... But when I point his out he gets all upset....
Oh my! I had a case of a third eye this weekend, right in between my eyes on my nose!! So embarrasing! I wish I had casper boobs. Live it up girl, serious.. if you had a set of watermellons you couldn't wear cute shirts, swim suits ect..! :)
I am so impressed how well you handled that. I would have been bawling. Sometimes I notice Sam looking about three inches above my head instead of looking me in the eye. Yeah, I have frizzy hair. What can you do?
Just last week I had a MONSTER of a zit and as I get in the car My Rock says "oh didn't know you were bringing a friend along"..real cute punk. haha! Then he got distracted by my boobs so all was well again. hahaha!
At least he's honest. My husband always says, you're skin is beautiful, when it definitely is not. Maybe I should appreciate the fact that I've got big girls to distract from that.
Hahaha! I almost peed my pants! :D
I think I've got you beat with like 5 eyes going on on my face right now. I get to school and BOOM My face breaks out like crazy... And can't say I have casper boobs, but I don't even think they're enough to distract from the mountain range going on on my face.
Honey, just wait 'till you have babies. And wait until the day your milk comes-in and Ted can't get within 50 feet of 'em. The torture he will feel from seeing them at a size he's never seen before, yet knowing he can't lay a hand on them will be payback for the zit comments.
I used to have casper boobs too.. then I got married, and about 2 months later I grew a whole cup size..
I liked it for a whole 2 weeks, until I realized that you can NEVER cover the cleavage unless you wear a tshirt. Who wants to wear a tshirt every day? Pssh.
Oh man! I can totally relate. I mean, my 'ladies' have always been small to begin with, but then throw in two nursing babies, and they're pretty much non-existent. I, too would rather have someone staring at my chest than the zits on my face. I'm glad I'm not alone in this! :-)
on the topic of boobs...one of my friends thought she was complimenting how small i am while pregnant and said, "your boobs haven't even gained any weight."
totally not a compliment! the least the girls could do is get big like they're supposed to while i'm prego!!
but i guess i shouldn't speak before the milk comes in...i may regret my feelings by then...
hahaha! i know exactly what you mean about casper boobs! i am not ashamed of my padded bra. :)
ugh...i know what you mean about the hubs staring at your zits.
jess ALWAYS points mine out.
jess: "wow. you got a HUGE one. did you notice?"
brit: "of COURSE not. and you weren't supposed to either after i caked the make-up on over it. thanks."
jess: "want me to get it?"
he LOVES popping them for me. gross.
Oh Lauren... I love your photos. If we ever meet in real life, I may force you to show me how to take those photos and then crop out the corners so deliciously for your blog. I'll make you brownies... or pie... or whatever you want, really.
i know the feeling!!
my ever so kind fiance pointed out a lovely zit on my forehead just last week. thanks honey! you are just soooo sweet, ha!
I have to agree with Thorny Tree Lady.
I can't relate on the boob thing,I had boobs when I was 10. It sucked. The End.
to all the itty bitty titty ladies, embrace it, yes, guys notice big boobs, but, guys also notice little boobs, guys just notice boobs.
The difference is, with big boobs, it messes with all your outfits, your back hurts, you can't go out without a bra ever, bras never fit right, they sag (due to the bigness) it's really not all it's cracked up to be.
Little boobs on the other hand are FABULOUS for fashion, plus you can always plump them up with the right bra/insert, but, getting big boobs to look smaller hurts, a lot.
Been there ...
This is hilirious!!
hahaha you make me laugh so hard. Not gonna lie, not having a chest def. has its advantages.
casper boobs i have myself. i need surgery. srsly. but im too scared...and broke. haha. who needs boobs when you look smokin hot even with a zit?? not you my friend, not you.
hellooooo sister in the boob department. i have been praying for an extra cup size since i was 18, when i finally came to terms with the fact that i will be shopping the little girls bra racks for the eternities... boo.
From someone who had no boobs and grew to a DD when pregnant, it's better when they're small!
me is laughing. that is all.
Amen Thorny tree's comments.
I was nothing pre-baby.. and then I got HUGE! Just wait..
Small boobies = ummmm.....me times 2! Good thing my husband is a butt guy because I have more than enough of that!
I'm sure your zit wasn't that big, it always seems bigger when it is yourself.
I wish I knew you IRL. Seriously, I can completely relate on the boobs...and have thought some of the same things. Like Nicole above said, it's a good thing my hubby is a butt guy. But it stinks sometimes--especially after nursing 3 kiddos! Dang that's depressing...but some people stay bigger. I just totally didn't. Zits are evil. Why is it that it's not just a teenage thing like we always thought?
Pretty sure I just died laughing, this was seriously the funniest post ever!!
Aw, poor Lauren. Can't believe the Tedward said that!
To people who complain about guys staring at their boobs I say, "at least you got em!"
I'm so small I don't think I've ever caught a guy looking there.
I really don't get why guys like boobs so much.
Hahaha You and Ted are awesome.
Ah man that made me really LOL.
Now I am going to have to read catching fire.
i just started making comments about his zits... it stops him from mentioning mine, lol
BAHAHAHAHA
This made my day!!
Dude I could have a face brimming with zits (oh wait I do!) and STILL eyes are drawn to da boobsies!
LoL "Casper Boobs" !
At least you don't have back pain and permanent strap marks!
i always dreamt of being one of those girls that got a zit & it was a big deal/noticeable. (:
then there's me who @ age 26, and after two [yes two] rounds of acutane is still pledged by leprosy/acne that will never go away. when i get a zit, it's just business as usual. hahaha...
cute post, as always.
and by pledged i mean plagued.
I detest acne, bacne, chacne, and any other form of pimple there is. It STINKS. I do have to say, though, Ted is wrong about it being bigger than both your boobs. As I say, as I have a flat chest too, it's better to have small and perky boobs, than large and saggy boobs later on in life.... Now that I have officially weirded you out, I will stop.
I detest acne, bacne, chacne, and any other form of pimple there is. It STINKS. I do have to say, though, Ted is wrong about it being bigger than both your boobs. As I say, as I have a flat chest too, it's better to have small and perky boobs, than large and saggy boobs later on in life.... Now that I have officially weirded you out, I will stop.
Aaaaand this is why I ♥ you. Awesome that your drew a zit on your picture!
It is true, the other side is not so grand. My girls are big & I hate em.
Which would be worse a third eye or third boob...? Hmmm Anywho I saw those lovely pictures on your post before this and they are absolutely incredible!!! I would love for you to take pics of my baby when she comes/our little family! You're work is stunning I love it! Would you mind e-mailing me a guessimate of how much something like that might be! Obviously it's not for a little while but that would be so great! You are a doll :)brezer12@yahoo.com
This is why I love you lauren. You make all us ( Um....Ok, me ) Small chested zit faced grils feel better!!! I would rather have people look at my non-existent boobies than the GIANT zit on my chin!!
i love how you drew the nastiest zit on your face!! red&greenyellow nastyness....oh zits how i despise you. but dont you love when you pop them & it splooges everywhere??
er...or maybe its just me.
Hahahaaaa! That's awesome! We do the same thing...pick on each other, I mean. The hubs has the zit problems, but I'm the "unblessed one" as you called it. I'm just happy I can comfortably sleep on my tummy. Wouldn't have it any other way!
You are so stinking funny!
Hahaha! That sounds like us when we first got married. But then I would tease him back and he would get all sensitive. So we called a truce. Now we pretend just not to see them and stare when we think the other isn't looking. I about died about the boobie thing. I come from a very small chested family and it just sounds like something we'd say. I did eventually get more than my fair share of boobage...but I can still remember my mosquito bite days so I can totally relate! You jut crack me up!
I hate zits! I thought for sure that once I became an "adult" (after age 18) they would go away...wrong!
That's funny, except I'm pretty sure I would cry if my husband said that to me. But I am pretty sensitive. My boobs are huge, especially after having my baby...trust me, be grateful you don't have 'em! They suck. But, as it is, everyone wants what they don't have and what they have they don't want.
When guys stare at my boobs, I just say, "They won't answer you."
You have boobs?
haha! Oh my heck this is like the funniest post I've ever read in my life. When can we play?
Shame on the Tedward!
AWW! I know the feeling. My hubs points out when I get a zit too. His excuse "what? I grew up with a brother...he all but drew a circle around mine with a red sharpie"..sigh. This made me giggle, love it :)
I feel ya on the no boobs sister. I just noticed that this says "I will cyber punch you in the face and feed you to my Hippogriff."
That is all.
HAHAHAHAHAH! oh man that makes me laugh! I quite frequently get a case of the "third eye" syndrome!! seriously it sucks!
oh ya, i used to have boobs, then turned non-existant! its all good though :)
I too am an A-. It's really sad when you're nursing all day long and still have to wear a huge padded bra. This is the one time I'm supposed to get them! What's up with that?
at least he's honest? hahah. poor tedward. dug his own grave right there.
I'm dying right now! This is so funny.
I do hate having a large zit on my face because I feel like that's all anyone can look at. Quite embarrassing!
So happy to hear you are reading catching fire!
Ha ha ha. Oh man. I have the same problem though soo.. ah not funny!
Heh, you said boobs.
Yeah, I'm a grown man.
Ugh!Zits are nasty! Having tiny, under/unevenly sized girls is nasty too! No fun, no fun, especially when you're the only one of your friends who JUST BARELY got out of littl girly sized bras and your already a Sophomore. Embarassing right? But, on the bright side, I don't have to worry about creepers looking at them. THey'll spend to much time looking FOR them, get tired, and give up. :) Oh the joys of being flat chested.
hahahahah so funny Lauren!
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